Birthday At The Banya

On Saturday we got to celebrate John's birthday with his family at the banya. It was so fun, and we felt honored that they invited us! I thought I'd taken a good picture of John and Sharon that day, but I can't find it now!



A banya is a bath house where there's steam and a sauna (and sometimes a pool) for getting nice and clean. Normally the sauna is too hot and the pool too cold for kids, but this pool was a perfect temperature and both girls really enjoyed it. Of course, anything with Heidi is 10x more fun!!




This picture is steamy, but I think it's cute of Leif with his girls in his banya hat. We got John a banya hat for his birthday, so now he can be stylish like Leif.



It was SO CUTE how Ella loved splashing the water with her little hand. There's a lap pool not far from our apartment, but I heard that it's cold. I wish there were a pool for the kids to play in close by. It's such a fun thing to do... especially as it's too cold to play outside. We were thankful for this fun day!

Hanging Out Together

"Let's talk about Ella being big", is a common phrase from Anneka. She loves her sister as she is (a baby), but she also loves to think about Ella being big enough to play with. Ella loves to watch her sister and hang out with her. Anneka plays so nicely by herself, and Ella is an avid fan.




A couple of weeks ago we went to visit Inka in Zaigraiva (the village where she moved to). I didn't take any pictures that day, as it was kind of rough. Anneka fell down the stairs before we went, had a "pee-pee accident" while we were there (with no change of clothes), and it was just before we knew she had a cold so she was tired and kind of cranky. And Ella wouldn't eat while we were there. Anyways, we'll need to go and visit Inka again and hopefully things will go a little better this next time. We miss her!! Here is how Anneka fell asleep in the car on the way out there. It's so funny how she had her leg propped up on the other.

Counting Our Blessings

We celebrated a nice Thanksgiving at the Kerins with teammates and friends. The night before, Leif and I counted our blessings by writing many, many things we're thankful for from this past year into our "thankful book". It's amazing all that can happen in a year and how many prayers are answered and sweet moments there are to celebrate.



This is what we looked like as we prepared to leave our apartment. It's cold out now... even as I type it's -22F. Brrr. Ella was dressed in her snowsuit and a snowsack. She looked like a Russian baby all bundled up.



There were 20 of us total. We had the traditional Thanksgiving meal with chicken substituting the turkey and carrots prepared like sweet potatoes. Leif and I brought stuffing and apple pie. He rolled out the crust... my least favorite part! Before we all ate we sang the song "Count Your Blessings" and between choruses we each shared things we're thankful for this past year. Later on we sang more praise songs to God.



Rebecca's friend, Nadia, brought a cake with the Mayflower on it! She even dressed like a Native American with a headdress and everything... but I missed getting a picture of that. =)



Ella has begun the stranger anxiety phase of babyhood, but on this day she let other people hold her. She also both ate and slept well that day- something huge to be thankful for!




Here are the kids eating dessert together. Anneka loved playing with the girls, and she did amazing for having no nap and staying up late.

We always miss our families during this time of the year, but we are also always amazed by how God gives us sweet blessings as we are away!

At The Fruit Stand

When our family traveled all over the city for medical tests for our residency, I thought, "Great! I can have Ella weighed" to see if she's growing okay. But at one clinic they said we had to take her to another clinic across town. And when we got there, the wait was HOURS long. We actually waited for a couple of hours because we needed a medical card to take the the tuberculosis clinic. But then they closed the doors at 5:00 and sent everyone home. All to say, I don't know how anyone could actually wait it out at a clinic to have their baby weighed. So I took Ella to our local fruit stand. And Ella squiggled. And we don't know exactly how much she weights. But I don't think she's lost weight. And I think we're not supposed to worry!

Anneka's First Haircut

Anneka is three and she just got her very first haircut last week! She was bald for her baby life and only really started growing hair after she was 2. Martina was nice enough to be the hairdresser.



The weather here is so dry, so what were cute curls in the States often looked like a scraggly mess here. So we did something about it. Martina cut these really long strands in the back.



It's not that much shorter, but it looks so much better!

Speaking of Anneka, she is such a caring, sensitive girl. I had a migraine last week and Leif was gone in the evening. All on her own she put her little hand on my head and prayed for me. Then she brought me a cold washcloth and put it on my forehead and she said she wanted to give me a bath (but needed help turning on the water in the bathtub). She kept saying, "I'll take care of you, Mama!"

Another sweet (and sad) thing happened when I was reading her a book called The Rescuers. There's a little girl named Penny in the book who is an orphan. At the end of the book there's a man interviewing Penny and Anneka asked me, "Is that her Papa?" I explained that it was just an announcer, and she asked me, "Where is her Papa?" I told her that Penny didn't have a mama or papa... that she was an orphan. Anneka's little chin began to quiver and her eyes filled with tears. Then she started sobbing! She cried, "I thought everyone had a mama and papa!" We prayed together for kids who don't have parents and talked about families that we know who have adopted orphans. It really IS a sad, sad thing, and I love that Anneka feels so deeply.

And yesterday while Anneka and I ate leftovers for lunch, Leif was late in coming because he was on skype with someone. We were both really hungry and Leif's food was sitting there hot after we'd finished ours, and I asked her, "Should we eat Papa's lunch, too?" "No!" she said, "it's Papa's!" It didn't matter that I could get him more from the refrigerator. She was looking out for him.

Buryat New Testament!

I (Leif) had the privilege of going to an historic event a week ago. At the National Museum of the Republic of Buryatia, there was a presentation of the New Testament in the Buryat language! This is such a wonderful thing to have to bring the good new of Jesus to the Buryat people. This is actually not the first translation of the Bible into Buryat, but it is the first translation into modern Buryat, and therefore the only translation that people can actually read and understand. Work on this current translation was started twenty years ago by the Institute of Bible Translation which is based in Moscow and is working on getting the Bible translated into all the languages of Russia and central Asia. From all that I have heard, I feel like this translation was done well. The translators were taught Greek to be able to read the earliest extant versions of the New Testament, they worked with various Biblical scholars and translators and compared it with various translations in other languages to try to produce an accurate and understandable version of the New Testament. Please continue to pray for the translation of the Old Testament. There is another group that has taken on this work. Pray that it will come to print soon, and that it will also be accurate and understandable. It will be great to have the Old Testament too, as it is the foundation on which the New Testament rests, and it contains so many examples of cultural and religious similarities for the Buryat people. But even just having part of the scriptures in Buryat will open up people here to see that Jesus is not just the God of the Russians, but that He is the God of all and that He loves the Buryats personally and fully!

God's Grace and New Neighbors

Okay, so I'm sure Martina won't be thrilled that THIS is the first picture I'm showing of her. But it was just too funny not to post! She's our new neighbor from Canada, along with her husband, Dave, and adorable boys who are 3 and 5. On this particular day, we had taken the kids to the playground and a lady came up to tell us something. At first we had no idea what she'd said (as you can see evidenced on our faces)... and the second time was as clear as could be. I think she'd used slang and more "common language" the first time than what we'd learned in our classes. But don't get me wrong- we both wear these faces a lot here in Russia.

This great family moved here less than a week before we arrived. And they didn't have a stove or refrigerator or anything. When we got here I had thoughts of just making extra of whatever I was making for dinner and taking it to them or having them over. And intentions of watching the boys a lot while they ran errands and got set up. And thoughts of helping. And then BAM! I felt like we got hit with more than I could handle. Ella's not eating suddenly became a serious issue that pervaded anything else. And I felt like I couldn't even take care of my own family, much less care for them. I realized that I had certain pictures in my mind of what a good wife, mom, neighbor, friend, etc looked like and I wasn't measuring up to any of those. But God used that to show me His great grace. He wanted me to know that He loves me for ME, not for what I do or don't do. And He's allowed me to live in this season, wanting me to just rest in Him and know His love more fully.

But the really HUMBLING part is that Martina has made US food and their family has done all sorts of kind things for US! I'm so thankful for them and blessed by them and looking forward to grow in our friendships with the whole family. This week Anneka, Ella, and I have had yucky colds. Our refrigerator was empty, but grocery shopping seemed out of the question (it's a big excursion and one you don't want to make with two sick kiddos) When Martina was out with Sharon on Thursday they called and asked what they could pick up for us at the store. And then Sharon and Heidi came and picked up Anneka for a few hours. And Martina brought us dinner. I felt overwhelmed by God's care of us. Leif's been really busy this past week and we haven't been able to leave on dates because of Ella's poor eating. It was like God brought us a date at home! And to top it off, Ella has been eating better the past few days. This is a miracle because her little nose is stuffy and she can hardly breathe when she eats. I know that people are praying for us.

I feel like I'm sort of rambling, but I'm so amazed by how God loves us and cares for us. And I'm thankful for this new family that He's brought to Ulan Ude!

Tuesdays, Our Sink, and A Helper

On Tuesdays, Leif gets together with the men from our church to share what God has been teaching them from the Bible, pray with one another, and to encourage one another. Anneka asks almost every day "is it Tuesday today?" She likes Tuesdays because I let her fall asleep in "Mama and Papa's bed". (Leif moves her when he gets home.) Here we were hanging out on a Tuesday night. Leif's had some late ones lately!

Yesterday on the way to the store, I let Anneka wear her snowpants out with nothing on underneath. I told her that it was our secret. She gets SO SWEATY in all of her outdoor clothes and it's not THAT cold yet. It's snowing today, but it's just below freezing. She thought it was wildly funny and wonderful to not have any pants on underneath her snowpants. She laughed and laughed and told me that she was "going to tell them" at the store. But she never did. =)

Speaking of the store, our new neighbor, Martina (from Canada) posted a great blog about going to the store. I can't believe I haven't even talked about our new neighbors yet!! I will more soon. =) Anyways, if you want to check it out, you can click HERE. If you want to picture me carrying the groceries remember to add a baby strapped to my front.


This is what our bathroom sink has looked like for weeks... but our landlord fixed it this week! And I bought step stools for Anneka. Whew!



Anneka loves playing kitchen and pretending to make pancakes, cookies, pizza, etc. The other evening she asked Leif to make cupcakes with her, and he decided they should make something real together in the real kitchen. They made popovers in her cute little muffin tin. The last couple of days Leif has been at a conference and Anneka and I have made pizza and cookies. She's a good and happy helper.

The speaker at the conference has been a leading theologian from the slavic world. He's talked about a lot of crucial issues for the church as it interacts with culture and society and has challenged people every day. Leif has come home in the evenings with a full mind. I'm amazed at how much he understands in Russian! It's been nice for him to share everything with me in English. =)

Sometimes life is fun and games

Last weekend we got invited to one of the other churches in town for a family game day for families with little kids. Jami stayed home to concentrate on taking care of Ella with her lack of eating. She seems to be making progress, but still isn't eating the way we would like. Anyhow, Anneka and I represented team "Gustafson" at the games. There were a dozen or so stations that each family went through, and at each station we had to read and learn a verse that dealt with the theme of love. The way it worked it wouldn't have been too difficult if it had been in English, but Anneka seems to have lost her Russian speaking ability while we were in the states and I'm still not the best Russian speaker either. We know Anneka will pick up Russian quickly, but that didn't make saying these verses any easier this time. As we shared the verse, we were supposed to do some sort of game such as throwing balls into a bucket, jumping rope, hoola-hooping, etc. Anneka had a bit of trouble with jumping rope by herself so I decided to put her on my back and have a go at it together with her (see pic. above). With the hoola-hoop, I was no help AT ALL! I never have been able to figure that one out. We had a great time together, and enjoyed spending the time with some of our Russian friends as well as with our teammates the Brubachers.



They even scored us on all of the games and on how well we memorized the verses. Let's just say that this was one of those times where we talk about how winning and losing doesn't matter as long as you're having fun :). I'm glad others got to enjoy the prizes though, and we did get a candy bar for participating, so we were both happy with that, and so was Jami who got a little bit from both Anneka and I.

His Face Is Still Spreading

We came back to Ulan Ude to see more banners and signs with Leif's face all over the city. Here's a different pose than the previous banners:



It's HUGE!

Ella's Paperwork Is In!

We celebrated on Friday as we turned in all of Ella's paperwork for her temporary residency. This is no small thing, as it usually requires multiple trips to the office (it only took us two) and waiting in long lines and having everything PERFECT- all of the documents and translations and medical forms, etc. The lady who handled our paperwork was SO nice and patient. It was such a relief to have that done! I took this picture of Leif and Anneka as we waited for a mini bus after turning everything in. We just missed the first bus and the second one covered it's number and drove right past. But we caught the third one!

For some reason the blog won't let me add any more pictures right now. I'll wait to tell more stories once it lets me again. For now I'll tell you about the fish smell in our living room. Since we've returned, the corner of our living room where our desk lives smells like dead fish. We've looked and sniffed all over- behind and under the desk, t.v. stand, carpet, garbage can, etc. We can't find the source. It's a mystery, and one that I hope is solved soon.

Anneka is 3!!!

Anneka celebrated her birthday three times this year (after all, she is three years old!) For her actual birthday, Leif and Anneka made two cakes. They took one to church and everyone ate it together after the service (and sang to her, too) and the other was for our family later that evening.



On her birthday, the most exciting part for Anneka was getting to open her big present- a doll house! She LOVES it! We toted this thing all the way from America and wondered if it was a little bit silly to fill up a whole precious suitcase with a toy. But we are SO glad we did it! She plays with it constantly and is truly delighted with it. It's really cute how she likes make her dolls talk and makes up all sorts of fun scenarios for them.



Before we left the States, we also had a little party with Gramma Irene, my parents, and my friend Erin.



This squirrel costume has a funny story. When I bought it, the tag said "dog costume" and I thought, "Whoever wrote this clearly doesn't know a squirrel when they see one!" and I thought it would be fun for Ella. But when we brought it home, we realized that it's a costume for a DOG. haha. It didn't fit quite right.



My aunt and uncle and grandparents threw a big family party for Anneka the day before we left. I didn't get many pictures on my camera from the day, but Anneka was just glowing! She loved the decorations and the games and the presents and the attention and was so sweet about it. She got great gifts for the airplane. I was thankful for this family time to be focused on Anneka and the happiness of her birthday rather than the sadness of us leaving! It was a sweet time together!

Progressing Forward

The last days have been three steps forward and two steps back... but the general trend is FORWARD!! Ella has been eating better bit by bit (and I think that she's feeling better, too. If it was her ears or throat before, she seems to feel fine now). And for moments in the last two days I've entered into the world again! Thank you so much for your prayers. It's such a vulnerable place to be in when something is wrong with your child. I sense that God is wanting to increase our faith in Him all the more and draw us closer to Himself. He'll do whatever it takes for that to happen, and though it's hard, I'm thankful.

I told you I'd tell you about the medical tests we've had to do. Oh, what a long story it would be!! But I'll give you a few highlights:

- ALL of us had to be tested for STDs, and this included them having to take the girls' blood (and other un-fun cultures)
- Leif and I had to get chest X-rays to check for tuberculosis and the girls had to have skin tests. In all these simple tests just for T.B. took three different days, trips to different clinics, waiting in lines for special cards for the kids (which we never got), going to a pharmacy, a kiosk, and back to the skin test place again.
- We also had to have HIV tests. This is one where it's a long story that unfortunately I can't write about. Ella got jabbed several times in both arms. Poor baby. And it's a fasting blood test, so poor Anneka was super-hungry by the time they drew her blood. But it's done! That's the best part.
- We had to be tested for narcotics, too. There was a long line, but a lady suggested we cut because we had two little ones, and everyone else in line agreed.

This whole process has been long and tiring, but God has not given us more than we could bear. At two places huge lines of people came RIGHT after we arrived, and we know it would have taken hours longer had we arrived minutes later. Also, Anneka has been so sweet about being jabbed and prodded. She's been happy to get Kinder eggs (those chocolate eggs with toys inside) as treats for enduring everything.

We hope to turn in our paperwork for our residency tomorrow. We totally understand that they want to make sure we're healthy before allowing us to live here long-term. But we're thankful these medical trips are over!!

A Trying Time

It's been a hard couple of weeks. Ella's eating has been sketchy, and I'm exhausted and weary. We've had to tromp all over the city for medical tests to apply for our long term residency (the details for another blog). And it's just been hard. We appreciate your prayers and will hopefully be back to blogging more frequently soon!

Our Sweet Ella

The day before we left to come back to Siberia we dedicated Ella to the Lord at our church service. We love her so much, and we've been reminded a lot this past week that she belongs to Him as she hasn't been eating well again. It's so scary when you know your daughter isn't getting enough and when dehydration is a concern... especially when you're not in your home country.

This past day, she's begun eating better, and we pray that it's a turnaround! I'm thankful that God brings us to places where we have to trust in Him more. I'm reminded that He is powerful and He is loving. And we're in His strong and loving hands.

Adjusting To Our New World

The only reason I have time to blog right now is because both girls are sleeping and they are in separate rooms... and I've done all that I can do in the living room and kitchen (and don't want to risk waking them up in their rooms).

This past week has felt pretty hectic. We came into it already tired, and now we're trying to adjust. As one of the girls will likely wake up soon, I'll give brief glimpses of the past few days:

JET LAG- Anneka waking at 1:30 and not going back to sleep until 4:30, when Ella wakes up, bed hopping (at one point all four of us were in one bed!), walking around in a daze in the late afternoon, falling asleep on public transportation, etc.

DISASTER HOME- unpacking all of the stuff we boxed away while our Russian friends lived here, putting away all of the stuff we brought from the States, finding lots of broken stuff (including our bathroom faucet and toilet).

LINES, DOCUMENTS, PAPERWORK- getting Ella registered, turning in our documents after being in the States for 5 months, preparing to apply for our long-term residency, going to the notary, going to the translation office (multiple times, I may add... this story could be longer, but we'll just say it's tiring, especially with two kiddos).

ADJUSTING TO TWO- I've had so much help this summer that I'm just now adjusting to having two kids. It doesn't help that we're all jet lagged and that Anneka caught a cold. But it's interesting. Our nearby store has been closed every day and I'm thinking it may be closed for good! This makes walking to the other store (still not that far away, but farther) a big event with a baby and toddler. Anneka doesn't want to step on any cracks or any garbage, so it takes FOREVER to walk anywhere. It's like an obstacle course.

But on the up side, I think we're all feeling glad to be back. Anneka has said several times, "I like our Russia home". I'm so thankful!! She doesn't remember any Russian and asks all the time what people are saying. She talks REALLY LOUDLY everywhere we go. There's no hiding that we're foreigners. She's such a funny girl. I love her.

We made it!

After four airplanes and a few days, we have arrived! Leif put it mildly in the last post about having more stuff with kids. In reality, we were a traveling circus. EVEN AFTER we checked in our four big bags. With our carry-ons alone, we were a traveling circus. It's amazing we didn't lose anything. That's just one of the ways God provided for us. The girls were champion travelers. Ella still had an inflamed ear after an infection a couple of weeks ago, and we were anticipating pain and tears. But she was as happy as could be. On the overseas flight she didn't cry AT ALL and on the other three, she cried about 2 minutes each. We were entering into the travel already worn and ragged. I am SO thankful for God's mercy in this!!



Here's Ella in a little floor bassinet on the overseas flight. Mostly she was in my arms the whole time, which made her SO HAPPY. I just put her in the bassinet to let her kick.

This baby had us so worried the week leading up to our departure. She was eating really poorly for over a week. Since she's such a big baby (and content baby!), it was harder to recognize right away just how serious it was. But it got so bad that Leif had to pack and move all of our stuff out of our apartment by himself (my dad helped moved/carry the big stuff). And I just attended to Ella. I was sick, too... I think it was from worry actually. The week before coming back is always so hard. Hard to say goodbyes, hard to take care of details like moving and getting rid of cars, hard to pack for everything you'll need in the next 2 years, etc.



I had prayed a few weeks ago that God would help to prepare us in every way, and I specifically prayed that He'd help to increase our trust in Him and that He'd prepare us spiritually to come back. I know that He did just that. God brought in our needed financial support in about 3 weeks time, He brought in all of Ella's paperwork with less than a week to spare, and He put us on our knees about Ella's health, knowing that we were dependent on Him to heal her for us to be able to leave in time. In the middle of it all, He gave me this verse: "But this happened that we might not rely on ourselves but on God, who raises the dead" and "On him we have set our hope that he will continue to deliver us, as you help us by your prayers. Then many will give thanks on our behalf for the gracious favor granted us in answer to the prayers of many." (2 Cor 1:9b,10b,11) I was certainly reminded of the power of prayer!

God reminded me of His heart in little ways. One example is that I wanted to find a Dad doll for a dollhouse we brought overseas for Anneka. It was down to the wire with time (and that wasn't a priority) so I figured I'd just have to let that one go. Well, our neighbors in our apartment had a yard sale for just a couple of hours, and they had dollhouse furniture and a Dad doll!! God used that to remind me that if He cares about little things like Dad dolls, then of course He cares about things like Ella's health. And how much more does He care about the eternal parts of people!! I love how He shows us His heart.



We did something in Moscow that we've never done before, but I'm SO GLAD we did! We had an 11 hour layover and got a hotel room for the day (after we went through passport control and checked our bags, it was about 5 or 6 hours at the hotel). We all slept and it helped us to be ready for the final- and worst- flight of the whole trip (from Moscow to Ulan Ude). The things you do with kids are a lot different than what you do without them!

In Transit

We are on our way!!! Right now we are at a hotel near the Sea-Tac Airport trying to get some sleep before an early morning flight. We should be there (Ulan-Ude) in a couple of days :). It is amazing how much more stuff we have when we travel now that we have a baby and a little girl!!!

Autumn Is Here

Last week we went camping with my parents. We knew we needed to plan something away in order to get quality time with them before we leave. The last days are speeding by, and it's easy to feel drowned in all of the busyness.



It was so nice to be up in the woods, away from phones and noise. We went to a place that my family always went when I was a girl. It was so fun to think back on many fun memories. Here's Grampa with his girls.



Leif took Anneka creek fishing, and she was so thrilled at the first fish they caught that she held on tight to it for over an hour. By the time I brought her back to camp, the fish was well loved and kind of mangled.



Here, Anneka is helping Leif clean all of the fish. Anneka, by the way, loves to eat the fish heads. If you ever have a fish head, she'll offer to eat it for you. Crunch, crunch, crunch.



Ella liked camping, too. She's such a good baby!



My dad was the main cook out camping. On the last morning, we sat around while my Dad made us a nice pancake and bacon breakfast over the fire. It was so great to all be together.

Anneka caught a cold the last day and was pretty miserable. The days after camping both girls had colds. And I've had two migraines this week. Yuck! It's hard to be sick when there's so much to do now that we're back home.


We have plane tickets to return to Russia two weeks from today. I'm never a fan of the last couple of weeks. There's so much to do (packing up our apartment, deciding what to take back to Russia, buying last minute needs, raising last minute support), and what I really want to do is be with people. That's the hardest part about leaving America- the people here that we so dearly love. As the weather turns colder, it seems like a natural time to leave. Summer is over and autumn is here.

If it weren't for a confirmed calling on our lives, we'd be nuts to rip our girls away from they're grandparents and take them to all the way across the world. I have total peace because God has given it, but that doesn't negate the sadness. And while it's true that I savor each moment with family and friends while we're here (a gift in itself), I always walk around with a lump in my throat the days prior to packing up and flying away.

On Sunday I listened to this song on the radio:
"Amazing love, what sacrifice
The Son of God, given for me
My debt He pays, and my death He dies
That I might live, that I might live!"

I was reminded that any sacrifice we make pales in comparison to the sacrifice Christ has made for us. And he has LIFE to offer. Life that most people don't know about. We so want them to know. Thank you, Lord, for all that you've done for us. May we live our lives in a way that brings you great glory!

Open Houses and Countdown

Both my parents and grandparents threw/are throwing Open Houses for us last weekend and this upcoming one. It's a time to connect with people we haven't seen yet and share about our lives in Russia. Above, my mom, grandma, and aunt came over to address invitations.



We left Ella in the car seat until she woke up at my parents' Open House. The poor girl somehow got an ear infection last week. She hates her medicine, too. She totally spit out the first two days worth of doses, and we tried every trick we knew (blowing on her face, shooting it in the back of her mouth past her tastebuds, holding her nose, rubbing her throat, wrapping her like a burrito, etc!). Saturday night we finally called the pediatrician's office and the nurse said that we just need to tell Ella who is boss. Leif was on the phone and he was thinking, "Do you realize that she's not even 3 months old?" He asked what to do when Ella spit the medicine out, and she said to scoop it off of her chin and jam it back into her mouth. So we tried it, and it's working! So funny and crazy at the same time. I'll be glad when she's done with day 10 of her medicine!!!




Here's Leif answering questions at the Open House.



My friend, Erin, drove up from Pullman. It was fun to see her! We've known each other since we were babies.

This week I've been feeling overwhelmed. We leave for Russia in less than 3 weeks, and there is SO MUCH to do! Raising financial support, buying last minute clothes and items, packing up our apartment, deciding what to pack to bring with us and what to leave here, seeing people, etc, etc. We haven't been home hardly at all and the place is a disaster and I'm just behind on everything. And besides all of this I have "baby mama brain" as I call it and just feel scattered and unorganized. Anneka caught a cold this week, and it's been a good reason for me to stay home with the girls yesterday and today. It meant cancelling some things, but I think it was necessary. I have a hard time saying "no", but it's easier when I can see that our girls need it. Anyways, I appreciate your prayers. The last month before heading back is always hard emotionally and physically.